Day #160 – Alike and Different

Here we are at the end of a week of celebrating the spectrum – all of it, the wonderfully unique and the devastatingly difficult.

One of the things that really struck me about this week’s sharing is how willing these mothers were to pour their hearts onto a piece of paper (or your computer screen).  I asked once and they jumped at the chance.  That tells me a few things.

They need to tell their story.

Their stories told me…

They need a break.

They need more support.

They need people to listen and not try to fix, but just listen.

They need people to ask questions and be interested.

They need to be able to tell you the worst of it and not be judged.

They need to be able to tell you the best of it and not be judged.

They need a high-five and a ‘you’re doing a great job.’

They need a high-five for every milestone gained (no matter how small).

They need loving looks – not looks of pity.

What also struck me was how each one of them has come to terms with autism – they have made peace with autism…but refuse to give up.  They acknowledge the thing that causes their child to be differently abled – but refuse to let the thing control their child.  That type of strength and patience is truly remarkable.

They need to tell their story.

They were honest.  Sometimes painfully honest.  Most of the moms told me that they wrote 2,000 words and then tried to edit down to around 1,000 (I try to keep most blogs between 500-900 words).  One mom even sent me three different copies – each two pages long.

They need to tell their story.

These moms have a lot to say which leads me to believe there are other moms who want to tell their story.  So, here it is, an unexpected turn in my blog – send me your story.  Simply comment below and I will get you the email address.  I will continue to feature one of these stories once a week, a couple of times a month – however many that need to be shared.

I began writing to advocate and educate – what I didn’t expect along the way?  Catharsis – the true act of letting it go, letting it out, letting others in…and the result of that?  Amazing.  These moms were able to feel that for awhile – educating and advocating.  Mostly it reinforces the idea that everyone has a story.  Each one of us.

So the next time…

you are in a restaurant and see a child under a table…maybe instead of wondering what ‘type of parents those are,’ you’ll think of Kathy.

you are in the grocery store and a child begins singing “You don’t have to be lonely at Farmer’’…maybe instead of thinking about appropriate social protocol, you’ll think of Brandon.

you are in line dropping your child off at school and you see another child darting across the parking lot…maybe instead of shaking your head in contempt you will step out of your vehicle and work to keep him safe while thinking of Carter.

you see a child in the library who is spinning in circles…maybe instead of wondering why he is so out of control, you’ll think of Garrett.

you’re having a conversation and a child is painfully honest…maybe instead of thinking they are rude, you’ll think of Michael.

you are in the drugstore and notice a child has an iPad..maybe instead of thinking how unnecessary it is to  take technology everywhere you go, you’ll think of Isaac.

Maybe the next time that someone assumes they know what autism is all about you can help advocate and tell them about Tucker, Kathy, Brandon, Carter, Isaac, Noah, and Michael.  They are so much alike and remarkably different.

In this new week maybe we can all work on a new understanding of their most important likeness.

Innocent spirits and beautiful smiles that deserve love and respect from adults and peers alike.

6 thoughts on “Day #160 – Alike and Different

  1. Hugs to you Nikki… I don’t know why but I have tears reading every blog you write because I is exactly how I feel on so much of what you are feeling and have gone through as well! Reading all of these writtings from these mom’s
    touched my heart so. At times I felt like I wrote a sentence they wrote because it is the same feeling or same thing that has happened in my life.
    Thank you again for giving me an opportunity to get a little out, it felt good. Great idea and I really hope that this gives others a better view on what the spectrum is and how different, yet so the same individuals are. ♡:-D♡


    • Thank you, Gail – it is so true…for how different our children are there is a likeness that we can all recognize. I hope it was healing to you – I’ll definitely be calling on you again!


  2. Pingback: Day #279 – Tucker’s Version of Autism | 366 Days of Autism

  3. Pingback: Day #327 – Indexing | 366 Days of Autism

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