Do you (or your child) love to be touched?
I love, love, love teaching about the Love Languages. The premise of this theory is that people recognize and give love in five different ways: quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts, and touch.
I often wonder if Tucker ACTUALLY struggles with this (except the check list below is absolute proof) – or whether my love style has increased his need for touch. My first love style? Touch. My second? Words of Affirmation. If this is something you would like to read more about please go to: http://www.5lovelanguages.com My husband’s first love style? Touch. His second? Words of Affirmation. I hear vomit-like noises from readers…but he’s my someone. (See Day #66 – Be Someone’s Someone)
I love to touch and to be touched – I love it when my husband reaches for my hand nearly every time we get out of our vehicle and that when he gets home from work his first item of business is to hug me tight. I love it that my children still lay their head on my lap and ask me to rub their back, love bugs they are.
A ‘hypo-tactile’ person requires more stimulation. They will often seek activities that provide this extra feeling, check out the list below and you will see just how ‘hypo-tactile’ Tucker is. This certainly goes along with his need to be ‘grounded.’ (See Day 7 – Seven Senses)
He touches everything and everyone, he loves to feel. Evidence? His sister is SO patient with his need for love. Here they are at ages 9 and 11. Yes, I’m not joking. She was laying on a blanket and this is what he does…every single time. He is going to make an amazing partner someday…as long as they appreciate physical love.
He’s unsure of why pain really feels like – which is why his reaction to a paper cut matches his reaction to a 1 inch gash in his ankle (that will be a SUPER fun blog post).
We just got him new sheets – they are heavy fleece and although I love touch, these sheets make me sweat just looking at them. I can just imagine my nightly routine. Snuggling in, feeling awesome, and then about 1 AM screaming “I’m HOOOOOT (hot…not hoot like an owl).” Then promptly throwing them off and running to open the window. Yes, I’m positive this is how it would go.
Him? He can’t wait to go to bed at night, just so he can crawl in and feel the warm, softness all over his body. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen this ridiculously happy look of content on his face. Between the weight of the blanket (See Day #53 – Weighted Blankets) and these fuzzy sheets he is literally in heaven. Tonight he took a shower and crawled into his bed at 7 PM…to read. READ, mind you – because those fuzzy sheets feel so good.
A lovebug in fuzzy sheets – it takes all self-control I have not to just crawl in with him…these are the moments that I remember just how blessed I am. The hypo-tactile’ness may cause problems (you’ll read about that in future posts) but I’m fairly certain many parents would gladly change places. A 12-year-old that still wants to and willingly (without prompting) hugs his mama? Pure bliss…
_x_ may crave touch, needs to touch everything and everyone
_x_ is not aware of being touched/bumped unless done with extreme force or intensity
_x_ is not bothered by injuries, like cuts and bruises, and shows no distress with shots (may even say they love getting shots!)
_x_ may not be aware that hands or face are dirty or feel his/her nose running
_x_ may be self-abusive; pinching, biting, or banging his own head
_x_ mouths objects excessively
__ frequently hurts other children or pets while playing
_x_ repeatedly touches surfaces or objects that are soothing (i.e., blanket)
_x_ seeks out surfaces and textures that provide strong tactile feedback
__ thoroughly enjoys and seeks out messy play
_x_ craves vibrating or strong sensory input
_x_ has a preference and craving for excessively spicy, sweet, sour, or salty foods